Introductory Activity

Activity

What are your thoughts concerning the use of the counselling skills you have learned about?

My thoughts about the counselling skills I have learned are largely positive, but also realistic about what it takes to use them well. I see these skills as valuable tools that can genuinely support someone in exploring their feelings and making sense of their experiences. Skills such as active listening, empathy, paraphrasing, reflecting feelings, and asking gentle, open questions create a safe and trusting atmosphere where deeper conversation can happen.

I also appreciate that these skills give structure and confidence. They offer a clear framework for how to respond in a way that is supportive rather than intrusive, and this helps me stay focused on the other person rather than worrying about what to say next.

At the same time, I am aware that using counselling skills effectively requires ongoing practice and self‑awareness. It is not enough to know the techniques; they need to be used naturally and sensitively, rather than in a mechanical or scripted way. I am learning that every person and every situation is different, and this requires humility and openness.

Overall, I believe the skills are powerful and meaningful when used with care. They have the potential to strengthen helping relationships, deepen understanding, and create space for personal growth—for both the helper and the person being supported.

What are your feelings around the use of counselling skills and how they might impact on a helping relationship?

My feelings about using counselling skills are mixed, and I am learning that this is a natural part of developing as a helper. On one hand, I feel a sense of purpose and satisfaction when these skills help someone feel genuinely heard and understood. Being able to offer empathy, attentive listening, and a calm presence can create a meaningful connection, and this feels rewarding.

At the same time, I also notice feelings of anxiety and self‑doubt. I sometimes worry about whether I am using the skills correctly or whether something I say might unintentionally cause discomfort. There is also an awareness of the responsibility involved in being present with someone else’s emotions, which can feel quite exposing at times.

Another feeling that arises is vulnerability. Sitting with another person’s distress requires openness and emotional availability, and this can feel challenging, especially when the material is sensitive or resonates with my own experiences.

Despite these mixed emotions, I recognise that counselling skills have a positive impact on helping relationships. They build trust, strengthen rapport, and create a safe space where the other person can explore their thoughts and feelings. Knowing this helps me stay committed to developing the skills, even when the process feels emotionally demanding.

What concerns might you have when using counselling skills in a helping relationship?

When using counselling skills in a helping relationship, several concerns naturally arise. One concern is whether my skills are developed enough to respond appropriately when someone shares something complex or emotionally intense. I sometimes worry about saying the wrong thing or missing an important cue.

Another concern involves maintaining clear boundaries. It can be challenging to stay within the limits of my role, especially when I feel an urge to give advice or take on too much responsibility for the other person’s situation. I am learning that staying within my remit is essential for safe and ethical practice.

I am also aware of the emotional impact of hearing difficult or sensitive material. There is a concern about how to manage my own reactions and ensure I have the right support, such as supervision or personal reflection, so that I do not become overwhelmed.

Situations involving risk, safeguarding, or ethical dilemmas are another area of concern. These moments require calm thinking and awareness of procedures, and I recognise that I am still developing confidence in this area.

Cultural sensitivity is also important. I am conscious of the risk of making assumptions about someone’s background, beliefs, or experiences, and I know this requires ongoing self‑awareness and openness.

Finally, I sometimes worry about recognising when an issue is beyond my level of training. Knowing when to refer someone to a more qualified professional can feel like a difficult judgment, but I understand it is a key part of responsible practice.

These concerns highlight why ongoing learning, supervision, and reflective practice are essential for developing safe and effective counselling skills.

Identify One concern about using your counselling skills that you have reflected on. How has this particular reflection benefited you or your use of counselling skills?

One concern I have reflected on is how to manage boundaries, especially the difference between offering supportive listening and slipping into giving advice or taking on responsibility for the client’s problems. During practice sessions, I noticed moments where I felt an urge to “fix” things for the other person, even when that went beyond my role or training.

Reflecting on these moments has been very beneficial. It helped me recognise that the impulse to over‑help often came from my own discomfort with seeing someone struggle, rather than from what the client actually needed. Understanding this has allowed me to pause, stay within the limits of my role, and focus on core counselling skills such as active listening, empathy, and summarising.

This reflection has strengthened my confidence because I now have a clearer sense of when I am working appropriately and when I need to step back or seek guidance. It has also helped me develop a more consistent internal framework for making boundary decisions during sessions. As a result, I am better able to support others safely while also protecting my own wellbeing and staying within ethical practice.